I dreamt of him last night, yet again. Why won’t thoughts of him leave my mind alone and let me have my life. 
After reading about the proverbs woman, I wanted to be like her in preparation of what may come in the future but all I want now is to crawl into a hole and run away.
What kind of example am I leading? God dear God, why me, why choose me for an insurmountable task, what do You see in me that I don’t. You know my deepest, darkest secrets and yet You want me to do Your work, You give me a higher calling. But Lord, I am questioning, are You sure it’s me You want? Are You sure it’s me who You want to impact youths. How can I do all that after how I’ve been leading my life.
God I am desperate. And now, I’m finally calling out to You and saying, “Lord, would You save me!”
